Coming into adulthood, I don't do trendy and familiar. I dare to be unique. To stand out from the crowd. I don't get caught up on mimicking celebs and the videos and following the advice of the magazines. Okay, so why am I seriously considering adorning my body with a tattoo?
For those who know me understand a commitment of this sort is not apart of my being. Check out what astrology says about Saggitarians...I embody 94% of my sign's characteristics. Now, I am committed to my Jesus, family, true friends, making a good life for myself, and being true to myself at all times. Other than that, permanency tends to be a bit much for me, hence my former serial dating years. So, a tat has always been far from my mind. I never could fathom having a stamp on my body that I could still be proud of 50 years later. I see chicks with stars, hearts, butterflies, names of children on their arms, neck, back, tummies, legs, etc. I have seen some huge tats with Tupac's name on a thigh or wings across backs. I used to wonder how anyone could go there.
But, for the past 6 months or so, it's been on my mind. Seriously. I thought about a very dainty picture of a butterfly for obvious reasons. Then I thought that is too cliche. Then it came to me. This could also be considered cliche...but I would be true to myself. I would be proud to wear a cross. A small cross on my body to remind me of my commitment to God. A cross that will put me in check when I try to go "there." This symbol is not necessarily for anyone except for me.
Some may ask why mark up the body? Would Jesus want me to do that? The answer is, I truly don't know. I am not sure if Jesus would agree with ear piercings, hair chemicals, nail polish, make up, hair cuts, or plastic surgery. But, for some reason I don't feel bad in anyway for my desire to bear a cross on my skin.
Many will not agree. And that is fine. We all have the right to choose and be who you are. It may have something to do with the artsy side of me. The side that loves great soul and gospel music, art, fashion, poetry, natural hair, and authenticity. The side that hates being put in a box with a label.
The great thing is, I am free to be me. To do me. And I am doing just that. I will do just that.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Monday, January 26, 2009
1st Date w/ Ex-Hubby: Part 3
After church service the next day, I anxiously awaited for Ty to come my way. But, he never did. He nervously smiled from a far, but quickly looked away. Okay, wait. I know we are to be careful, but everyone knows we are friends. What are you doing? Ty didn't call me that evening either. Or the next day or the days after that. The next Sunday, the same thing. Ty was avoiding me. What is going on? What happened in between the 12 hours that passed between our date and church service. Is there someone else? I check Ty's interaction with others to see if he is dating someone else at the church. No, he's not. He hasn't changed with anyone...except for me.
Now, I'm hurt. I am angry, upset and annoyed. I just can't understand it. I refuse to call him. I can't do it. Did I really just get played? But, I should call him and go off. That would make me feel better. Okay, no. I would be really stupid to do that. It would look childish. That's it. I'm too young for him. He thought about it, and now he doesn't want to do this anymore. Okay, but wait. You weren't thinking that when you were holding me and talking about the future. Wow...I got played. I straight got played. I never should have let my guard down. Wow, I thought he was different. Humph. I guess I am done. Yep, I'm done with him.
A few months pass, and Ty starts to come back around. But, I don't give him a chance. I totally ignore him. If I couldn't avoid him, I would say a quick hello and walk away. I don't want to hear excuses. I'm done with you. You still haven't explained yourself. You act like our 1st date never existed. So, I will treat you the very same way.
Years go by. I move out of state to attend an HBCU. I finally divorce Ty in my mind and move on with my life. I fall in and out of love in college. I mature and grow and begin to find my place in life. When I visit home, I barely see Ty at church because he travels on the job 80% of the time. I missed seeing him sometimes, but I was over him and was enjoying my blissful being.
I graduate from college, and return to the A to live. Ty moved on to another church and I hardly see him around the city. I may run into him once a year...if that. A few years ago, my play aunt makes a confession to me. She said Pastor found out about my date with Ty from a church member who saw us at the movies that night. Pastor forbade Ty the next morning from seeing or talking to me outside the church walls. He forbade Ty from talking to me about it and said he would be the one to do so. Ty assumed all these years that I knew everything, but blamed him for what happened. He thought I chose to be angry at him instead.
I spent a year's worth of time showering Ty with "I don't care about you" energy. Who knows what could have happened if things played out differently. I'm not mad at Pastor because he thought he was doing the right thing. He was being daddy. I just wished he would have been honest with me.
Everything happens for a reason, right? If nothing else, I will always have the magical memory of my 1st/last date with my ex-husband, Ty.
Now, I'm hurt. I am angry, upset and annoyed. I just can't understand it. I refuse to call him. I can't do it. Did I really just get played? But, I should call him and go off. That would make me feel better. Okay, no. I would be really stupid to do that. It would look childish. That's it. I'm too young for him. He thought about it, and now he doesn't want to do this anymore. Okay, but wait. You weren't thinking that when you were holding me and talking about the future. Wow...I got played. I straight got played. I never should have let my guard down. Wow, I thought he was different. Humph. I guess I am done. Yep, I'm done with him.
A few months pass, and Ty starts to come back around. But, I don't give him a chance. I totally ignore him. If I couldn't avoid him, I would say a quick hello and walk away. I don't want to hear excuses. I'm done with you. You still haven't explained yourself. You act like our 1st date never existed. So, I will treat you the very same way.
Years go by. I move out of state to attend an HBCU. I finally divorce Ty in my mind and move on with my life. I fall in and out of love in college. I mature and grow and begin to find my place in life. When I visit home, I barely see Ty at church because he travels on the job 80% of the time. I missed seeing him sometimes, but I was over him and was enjoying my blissful being.
I graduate from college, and return to the A to live. Ty moved on to another church and I hardly see him around the city. I may run into him once a year...if that. A few years ago, my play aunt makes a confession to me. She said Pastor found out about my date with Ty from a church member who saw us at the movies that night. Pastor forbade Ty the next morning from seeing or talking to me outside the church walls. He forbade Ty from talking to me about it and said he would be the one to do so. Ty assumed all these years that I knew everything, but blamed him for what happened. He thought I chose to be angry at him instead.
I spent a year's worth of time showering Ty with "I don't care about you" energy. Who knows what could have happened if things played out differently. I'm not mad at Pastor because he thought he was doing the right thing. He was being daddy. I just wished he would have been honest with me.
Everything happens for a reason, right? If nothing else, I will always have the magical memory of my 1st/last date with my ex-husband, Ty.
1st Date w/ Ex-Hubby: Part 2
My mother and sisters knew my feelings for Ty. Because mom knew him and his family very well, she looked past the age difference. He came from good stock, as she would say. His parents are good people and he has a good future. The boy loves the Lord too. You can't go wrong with that. Yep, mom was all about Ty. So, when I shared what just took place as we rode home from church, they were all giddy. The first thing Teri thought about is my attire. I hadn't made it that far in my thoughts, as I am still basking in the moment. However, she brought up a valid point. I have to be fly. This will be the first time Ty sees me outside of a church function. What do I wear?
After a day of shopping with the Soul Food crew that day, I chose an adorable sleeveless Calvin Klein khaki dress that fell just above the knee. I worked out and ate well, so my body was cut. It outlined my curves perfectly. I wore Anne Klein olive colored sandals with an olive colored purse. I thought I was too cute at 17. I would get my nails and my hair done Saturday morning before the date. I was ready for Ty.
When he called Monday as promised, we decided to see a movie, have an early dinner and let the rest of the evening come as it may.
Saturday afternoon, I slip on my dress as Ty calls to say he is on his way. I apply mascara and a bit of lip gloss as I become increasingly nervous. I tried to keep my cool for my mom and sisters, but I was terrified...in the most beautiful way.
Ty arrives at the house. I wait a few minutes before I make my way towards the kitchen to make my entrance. I walk in, and he beams. Wow, is he beaming for real, I think to myself. Is it possible he is as excited as I am?
Ty walks me to the passenger side of his luxury car and puts me in. He gets in and we proceed to ride the streets of the A. Before we get to the movies, he says he needs to grab a bite to eat quickly. Of course I am fine with anything we do today. He stops at McDonald's to grab a burger. Yep, like Carrie and the Russian. It was nice. I don't know what we talked about. I just know as we left the arches, he took my hand in his. It felt even more whimsical than I could have ever dreamed. Lord, let this night last forever.
Knowing every choice we made tonight would be about me, I chose to see the film Anaconda. I never enjoyed horror movies or anything dealing with reptiles. But, honey I was with my husband. And I wanted to feel safe with him. So he purchased tickets for the show. As we sat in our seats before the film started he whispers, "Now, if you get scared, you just lean this way. I got you." Boy, you ain't said nothing but a word. And I did exactly that. I jumped, and he wrapped that arm around me for the rest of the movie. *Inhale* This man smells delicious. I can stay here forever in his arms.
The movie is over, and we ride the city for hours. He shows me some nooks and crannies hidden in pockets of Atlanta. Neighborhoods I had no clue existed. He shared some life stories with me and fun times he had at Morehouse. We talked about what we wanted out of life. He grabbed my hand when he talked about the future. There we are. Hands clasped, listening to smooth jazz, exhaling the sweet aroma in the air. Only we exist right now.
Ty parks the car in a parking lot and we talk some more. He tells me places he wants to take me on our next date. He leans over and kisses my cheek. We sit there with hands held in silence for a while. Rain began to fall, which created a romantic backdrop for this majestic moment.
After hours of getting to know each other, Ty took me home. We sat in the car for a while before he walked me to the door. I wanted to kiss him, but I was afraid to. It's crazy because Buttafly has never been afraid to make a move if the flutter is there. But, I let him lead. He kisses my cheek again and tells me he looks forward to us going out again. We agree to do this again in 2 weeks. He tells me it will be a day full of surprises.
He calls me when he gets home. We remind each other to be careful at church the next day regarding our interaction. We both know we are not supposed to be dating, even though we were all out in the open today. But, neither of us can wait another year. I thank him for the night and we say goodnight 12 times before we actually hang up the phone. This could be the start of something really nice.
After a day of shopping with the Soul Food crew that day, I chose an adorable sleeveless Calvin Klein khaki dress that fell just above the knee. I worked out and ate well, so my body was cut. It outlined my curves perfectly. I wore Anne Klein olive colored sandals with an olive colored purse. I thought I was too cute at 17. I would get my nails and my hair done Saturday morning before the date. I was ready for Ty.
When he called Monday as promised, we decided to see a movie, have an early dinner and let the rest of the evening come as it may.
Saturday afternoon, I slip on my dress as Ty calls to say he is on his way. I apply mascara and a bit of lip gloss as I become increasingly nervous. I tried to keep my cool for my mom and sisters, but I was terrified...in the most beautiful way.
Ty arrives at the house. I wait a few minutes before I make my way towards the kitchen to make my entrance. I walk in, and he beams. Wow, is he beaming for real, I think to myself. Is it possible he is as excited as I am?
Ty walks me to the passenger side of his luxury car and puts me in. He gets in and we proceed to ride the streets of the A. Before we get to the movies, he says he needs to grab a bite to eat quickly. Of course I am fine with anything we do today. He stops at McDonald's to grab a burger. Yep, like Carrie and the Russian. It was nice. I don't know what we talked about. I just know as we left the arches, he took my hand in his. It felt even more whimsical than I could have ever dreamed. Lord, let this night last forever.
Knowing every choice we made tonight would be about me, I chose to see the film Anaconda. I never enjoyed horror movies or anything dealing with reptiles. But, honey I was with my husband. And I wanted to feel safe with him. So he purchased tickets for the show. As we sat in our seats before the film started he whispers, "Now, if you get scared, you just lean this way. I got you." Boy, you ain't said nothing but a word. And I did exactly that. I jumped, and he wrapped that arm around me for the rest of the movie. *Inhale* This man smells delicious. I can stay here forever in his arms.
The movie is over, and we ride the city for hours. He shows me some nooks and crannies hidden in pockets of Atlanta. Neighborhoods I had no clue existed. He shared some life stories with me and fun times he had at Morehouse. We talked about what we wanted out of life. He grabbed my hand when he talked about the future. There we are. Hands clasped, listening to smooth jazz, exhaling the sweet aroma in the air. Only we exist right now.
Ty parks the car in a parking lot and we talk some more. He tells me places he wants to take me on our next date. He leans over and kisses my cheek. We sit there with hands held in silence for a while. Rain began to fall, which created a romantic backdrop for this majestic moment.
After hours of getting to know each other, Ty took me home. We sat in the car for a while before he walked me to the door. I wanted to kiss him, but I was afraid to. It's crazy because Buttafly has never been afraid to make a move if the flutter is there. But, I let him lead. He kisses my cheek again and tells me he looks forward to us going out again. We agree to do this again in 2 weeks. He tells me it will be a day full of surprises.
He calls me when he gets home. We remind each other to be careful at church the next day regarding our interaction. We both know we are not supposed to be dating, even though we were all out in the open today. But, neither of us can wait another year. I thank him for the night and we say goodnight 12 times before we actually hang up the phone. This could be the start of something really nice.
1st Date w/ Ex-Hubby:Part 1
I reminisced on the most wonderful 1st date I have experienced to date. I was a teen and he was 6 years my senior. Love struck, I had the wedding ceremony, attire and location finalized in my dreams. Yes, I was naive enough to think this young man would wait for me to graduate high school and college before the proposal. I affectionately called Ty my husband to everyone....except him of course.
*smiling*
12 years ago, my pastor recited the benediction at the close of Sunday's worship service. As usual, I would try my best to ignore Ty as I fellowshipped with my church family. You know how it is at the church you grew up in. Sundays are weekly family reunions with people who are not your blood relatives. But, they have watched you mature and want the best for you, for the most part. Some you love and some...you just pray for them.
I beeline towards the pulpit to speak with my pastor/father-figure. As I wait in the short line, I spot Ty walking my way. I consciously turn my back away from him and began to mingle with anyone within 5 feet of me. My heart beat is picking up the pace.
You see, Ty and I would dance around each other all the time at church. The flirting was very subtle, but just enough to make me fall in love. At this point, we have known each other 2 years and clicked. Again, he is older so he was supposed to be a big brother. And he tried to keep it that way until this year rang in. I don't know what it was, but something changed in him. He lingered around me more, his hugs lasted longer, he would gaze at me sometimes. We were both very active in church and seemed to want many of the same things out of life. But our age difference bottled any desire I would ever have to simply hold his hand and lay my head on his shoulder.
My pastor recognized the chemistry between us and invited me to talk with him in private some months prior to this moment. He let me know he knew Ty would be great for me one day. But I had to graduate high school before we could date and matriculate through college before taking it to the next level. He took the role of my father when my dad. He knew what was best and that was that. I unwillingly agreed to 1 more year of church hugs...sigh.
Still talking to church members, my heart starts to pound in my chest.
faster. louder. louder. faster.
I feel the static from his presence pulling me as I know he's coming closer to me. I continue chatting as I command my heart to slow the pace just a taste. I take a slow, deep breath as Ty slips his arm around my waist to guide my body...twisting a 180 towards him. I see his face and I say, "Oh, hey boy. I was wondering who is trying to man handle me." His arm never leaves my waist as he starts to laugh that pauses with little snorts. He could be so goofy. Intelligent, man of God, handsome, prestigious background, and just as goofy as can be. That was one of the reasons I loved him so.
He has never held onto me so long before. I was thinking what is really going on. But, I kept my game face on. At the same time, I was enjoying this freeze in time. Ty was a great catch at the church. Many women poised their daughters to be his better half. I admit. I was a hater sometimes. But right now, in this moment, he was in my space. Eyes locked, his right hand resting on my right hip. Buttafly, don't lay your head on his shoulder girl. Keep it together.
I snapped out of it. I had to. Just as I turned to face him, bidding him farewell until next week, he says, "What are you doing this Saturday?" Before I could respond, he continues "I was thinking we could hang out somewhere. You know, make a day of it. Whatchu think?" Say what? Did my husband just ask me on a 1st date? The college graduate? The most eligible bachelor in this church? He is waiting on an answer, B. Speak, girl.
"Well, I don't have plans at the moment. What do you have in mind?"
"First things, first. Put your number in my phone and I will call you tomorrow. We'll go wherever you want to go. I'll make it happen."
"Sounds good."
Somebody please pinch me. No, wait...let me have my dream if this isn't real. I have been waiting on this moment for a very long time. Here it is, and I have no clue what to do with it. I gathered my thoughts and picked up my charm again as I saved my number in his cell. I placed the phone in his hand, leaned into his chest, grazed his cheek with mine, gave him a peck on that same cheek, and left him standing there.
I walked towards my Pastor hoping he didn't see what just went down. He welcomed me with open arms. Good, he has no clue I have a date this Saturday.
*pinch*
I'm not dreaming...
*smiling*
12 years ago, my pastor recited the benediction at the close of Sunday's worship service. As usual, I would try my best to ignore Ty as I fellowshipped with my church family. You know how it is at the church you grew up in. Sundays are weekly family reunions with people who are not your blood relatives. But, they have watched you mature and want the best for you, for the most part. Some you love and some...you just pray for them.
I beeline towards the pulpit to speak with my pastor/father-figure. As I wait in the short line, I spot Ty walking my way. I consciously turn my back away from him and began to mingle with anyone within 5 feet of me. My heart beat is picking up the pace.
You see, Ty and I would dance around each other all the time at church. The flirting was very subtle, but just enough to make me fall in love. At this point, we have known each other 2 years and clicked. Again, he is older so he was supposed to be a big brother. And he tried to keep it that way until this year rang in. I don't know what it was, but something changed in him. He lingered around me more, his hugs lasted longer, he would gaze at me sometimes. We were both very active in church and seemed to want many of the same things out of life. But our age difference bottled any desire I would ever have to simply hold his hand and lay my head on his shoulder.
My pastor recognized the chemistry between us and invited me to talk with him in private some months prior to this moment. He let me know he knew Ty would be great for me one day. But I had to graduate high school before we could date and matriculate through college before taking it to the next level. He took the role of my father when my dad. He knew what was best and that was that. I unwillingly agreed to 1 more year of church hugs...sigh.
Still talking to church members, my heart starts to pound in my chest.
faster. louder. louder. faster.
I feel the static from his presence pulling me as I know he's coming closer to me. I continue chatting as I command my heart to slow the pace just a taste. I take a slow, deep breath as Ty slips his arm around my waist to guide my body...twisting a 180 towards him. I see his face and I say, "Oh, hey boy. I was wondering who is trying to man handle me." His arm never leaves my waist as he starts to laugh that pauses with little snorts. He could be so goofy. Intelligent, man of God, handsome, prestigious background, and just as goofy as can be. That was one of the reasons I loved him so.
He has never held onto me so long before. I was thinking what is really going on. But, I kept my game face on. At the same time, I was enjoying this freeze in time. Ty was a great catch at the church. Many women poised their daughters to be his better half. I admit. I was a hater sometimes. But right now, in this moment, he was in my space. Eyes locked, his right hand resting on my right hip. Buttafly, don't lay your head on his shoulder girl. Keep it together.
I snapped out of it. I had to. Just as I turned to face him, bidding him farewell until next week, he says, "What are you doing this Saturday?" Before I could respond, he continues "I was thinking we could hang out somewhere. You know, make a day of it. Whatchu think?" Say what? Did my husband just ask me on a 1st date? The college graduate? The most eligible bachelor in this church? He is waiting on an answer, B. Speak, girl.
"Well, I don't have plans at the moment. What do you have in mind?"
"First things, first. Put your number in my phone and I will call you tomorrow. We'll go wherever you want to go. I'll make it happen."
"Sounds good."
Somebody please pinch me. No, wait...let me have my dream if this isn't real. I have been waiting on this moment for a very long time. Here it is, and I have no clue what to do with it. I gathered my thoughts and picked up my charm again as I saved my number in his cell. I placed the phone in his hand, leaned into his chest, grazed his cheek with mine, gave him a peck on that same cheek, and left him standing there.
I walked towards my Pastor hoping he didn't see what just went down. He welcomed me with open arms. Good, he has no clue I have a date this Saturday.
*pinch*
I'm not dreaming...
Friday, January 23, 2009
Good Times
It is starting to become an annual tradition to attend the Trumpet Awards. Last year I played the role as "seat filler" for the show. I admit I had a blast going from seat to seat while I working. I also had the esteemed pleasure of sitting on the front row as our 1st Lady, Michelle O., spoke before the crowd to campaign for her hubby. A class act. She makes me so proud.
I digress. I sat next to or around G. Garvin (much finer in person if that is even possible), Dawnn Lewis, Roland Martin, Soledad O'Brien, Hill Harper, India Arie, and....well that's all I can recall right now. G. is the only one I was concerned about. And I recall a very good looking brother with him, which is who I sat next to for a while. They were both very friendly and charming. Too bad I was working and followed strict orders not to "mingle" with the celebs as a filler. I was ready, too. Ready, set....but I couldn't go. oh well.
Any who, this time around I will be a guest. So, Ace and I are hitting it up. You already know the frantic thoughts of fashion, the jewels, the purse, the shoes, the hair are coming into play! Being that I was just graced with the tickets a short while ago, the time factor heightens the pressure!
Okay, seriously, there is no pressure. Being from Atlanta and enjoying the social scene, I certainly have cocktail dresses and all that jazz. But, there is always something in me that wants something new. I just bought a bad dress a few months ago for the Mayor's Mask Ball. I would LOVE to wear that again. Even if I changed the jewels and accessories, there is the risk someone might recognize it. I know I shouldn't care, but honey, let's be real. I do. My girlfriend said to me, "You think people will really remember?" Um, yes! This is Atlanta. It may be 4 million people here. But for the most part, the same people travel in the same circles. If the dress is fly enough, I would recall the 2 time wear if I saw it again. So, no...I can't go there.
I know my budget, and I am keeping that in mind with all the other priorities a girl has. So, either I buy a fly pair of shoes to complete a fab dress I haven't worn in 2 years. Or, I buy a cute dress, and adorn it with some killer heels from my cocoon. Oh, what to do by tomorrow...?
I'll check out some boutiques in s few hours and let my sights guide me. Either way, I plan to party and enjoy this continued celebration of President Barack's Inauguration. It wouldn't hurt to see G. again, or maybe Denzel will show up this year. Okay, who am I kidding. Mr. Washington is probably sitting in the Oval Office with President O. I wouldn't be surprised...
Fab Friday to you!
I digress. I sat next to or around G. Garvin (much finer in person if that is even possible), Dawnn Lewis, Roland Martin, Soledad O'Brien, Hill Harper, India Arie, and....well that's all I can recall right now. G. is the only one I was concerned about. And I recall a very good looking brother with him, which is who I sat next to for a while. They were both very friendly and charming. Too bad I was working and followed strict orders not to "mingle" with the celebs as a filler. I was ready, too. Ready, set....but I couldn't go. oh well.
Any who, this time around I will be a guest. So, Ace and I are hitting it up. You already know the frantic thoughts of fashion, the jewels, the purse, the shoes, the hair are coming into play! Being that I was just graced with the tickets a short while ago, the time factor heightens the pressure!
Okay, seriously, there is no pressure. Being from Atlanta and enjoying the social scene, I certainly have cocktail dresses and all that jazz. But, there is always something in me that wants something new. I just bought a bad dress a few months ago for the Mayor's Mask Ball. I would LOVE to wear that again. Even if I changed the jewels and accessories, there is the risk someone might recognize it. I know I shouldn't care, but honey, let's be real. I do. My girlfriend said to me, "You think people will really remember?" Um, yes! This is Atlanta. It may be 4 million people here. But for the most part, the same people travel in the same circles. If the dress is fly enough, I would recall the 2 time wear if I saw it again. So, no...I can't go there.
I know my budget, and I am keeping that in mind with all the other priorities a girl has. So, either I buy a fly pair of shoes to complete a fab dress I haven't worn in 2 years. Or, I buy a cute dress, and adorn it with some killer heels from my cocoon. Oh, what to do by tomorrow...?
I'll check out some boutiques in s few hours and let my sights guide me. Either way, I plan to party and enjoy this continued celebration of President Barack's Inauguration. It wouldn't hurt to see G. again, or maybe Denzel will show up this year. Okay, who am I kidding. Mr. Washington is probably sitting in the Oval Office with President O. I wouldn't be surprised...
Fab Friday to you!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
My President Is...
Ya'll know Jeezy set it off last year prophetically claiming his President was going to be Barack Obama. Many of us had hope, but we were holding our breath that the election didn't mirror that of 2004. We all tried to forget the rumors and the actual facts swept under the rug of that so-called victory. It's okay, we all thought. We will dust off and get back in the trenches to try this again... in this game of voting and politics.
The grassroots campaigning was such a success that it reached the entertainment world and the elite like never before. The average Joe and Sean made donations to Senator Obama's website. We registered people to vote. We discussed the elections as we gathering for social occasions. We tuned into CNN and became very familiar with the likes of Wolf and Campbell and Roland and Cafferty. We urged the need for change at the beauty and barber shops. Our ministers recalled the Civil Rights movement to push the vote. People sported Obama-Biden shirts, pins with the Obama family, put bumper stickers on their cars, females designed Obama art on their nails at the salons, and fellas carved Obama's name in their hair cuts.
For 2 years, the unexpected communities actively and tirelessly participated in the election process. We could smell victory and we had to ensure it came this time around. The time was out for waiting. The time was now.
We all shouted praises to God and finally gained unwavering faith that unity is what makes this thing work November 4th. We made travel plans to DC with our families in the midst of a recession. We put our money together to get there anyway we could. Many felt it was more than necessary when "our" President took his oath.
Others not able to attend the Presidential Inauguration in D.C. took the day off from work or school to gather with those closest to us. Some listened to radios, watched the I-casts, or assembled with co-workers and classmates in auditoriums and lunch rooms to watch the most special moment of all our lives.
January 20th arrives. It is 19 degrees in Washington. Approximately 2 Million people huddled together in love. Anticipation was felt globally as the human race eagerly anticipated the first glimpse of the President-Elect as he stepped onto the platform just before noon to put on his armour of authority. Head held high, shoulders broad, poker face with a slight smile, fresh confidence as he followed Michelle and his staff onto the platform.
Mr. Obama emerges from his seat, along with Michelle, Malia and Sasha towards the podium. Michelle holds the special Bible used once to inaugurate President Abraham Lincoln, Mr. Obama's model president. Within 20 seconds, President-Elect transforms into President Barack Hussein Obama before our eyes.
What did I feel? Pride. Victory. Unity. Joy. Emotion. Faith. For some reason, I didn't scream while others did. I simply kept my eyes fixed on this man who is the world's new leader for the next 8 years (I am learning from Jeezy). The man who will lead this human race as he follows God.
My President is Black. My President is Hawaiian. My President is American. My President is a Dad. My President is a Husband. My President is a Friend. My President is a Brother. My President is a Man of God. My President is a servant for the people. My President will change this world with love and the help of us all.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Nearly 41 Years Ago...
A man fought against injustice.A man lead a peaceful movement.
A man possessed the heart of God.
A man fulfilled his life's calling.
A man with....
purpose. anointing. burden. fight. heart. love. courage. tenacity. humility. guidance. spirit.
Born 80 years ago on this day just to die 39 years later so we could live with every human birth rite...freely.
Blow out your candles, Dr. King.
Michelle O and...
After Soulfood Sunday came to a close yesterday, I came home to rest a bit. I watched the HBO special of President Elect Obama's Inaugural ceremony held in DC. I was awed by the variety of actors, singers, philanthropists, and people with humble hearts that spoke or performed for the 1st and 2nd families. It was an awesome affair. (Side Note, do we or do we not have some good looking brothers in Obama and Biden coming into the White House? I respect the unions they have with their beautiful wives and I mean no disrespect. I just had to note those 2 are extremely intelligent AND handsome.)
Any who, so I was filled with Obama-Mania, as CNN calls it, by the time I traveled to slumber land last evening. As I slept, I had a few short dreams that I cannot recall. But, I do know that one included a scene in my mother's room. (Do you notice a trend of dreams occurring in or near my mother's house. Still haven't connected pieces to that puzzle yet). There I sit with Michelle O and her father. I have yet to see a photo of her deceased dad. But, I saw him as a very tall man who looks very much like his son. He wasn't a man of many words, but he was gentle and kind. It was obvious Michelle and her father were visiting Atlanta as she spoke of her desire to have some good barbecue from back home. I suggested she try some que from the legendary JJ's Rib Shack in the SWAT... as I bragged it's the best on the south side. Her father offered to get the food while Michelle and I stayed at the house to chat. Shortly after he made that statement, the dream was over.
I can't help but to think the spirit of Michelle's father is with her during this beautiful time where her husband will be inaugurated tomorrow as the 1st Black President of the United States of America. I am honored and pleased to be a young person who has been heavily involved in his campaign by registering voters, giving donations, sharing political facts with peers and friends, and offering my prayers for his family and supporters. The victory is here and the Obama's and Biden's are balancing a special burden that they were called to bear. I am sure Michelle's dad has been with her every step of the way to provide that support only a daddy can give his daughter.
A dad's love can be compared to no other...
Any who, so I was filled with Obama-Mania, as CNN calls it, by the time I traveled to slumber land last evening. As I slept, I had a few short dreams that I cannot recall. But, I do know that one included a scene in my mother's room. (Do you notice a trend of dreams occurring in or near my mother's house. Still haven't connected pieces to that puzzle yet). There I sit with Michelle O and her father. I have yet to see a photo of her deceased dad. But, I saw him as a very tall man who looks very much like his son. He wasn't a man of many words, but he was gentle and kind. It was obvious Michelle and her father were visiting Atlanta as she spoke of her desire to have some good barbecue from back home. I suggested she try some que from the legendary JJ's Rib Shack in the SWAT... as I bragged it's the best on the south side. Her father offered to get the food while Michelle and I stayed at the house to chat. Shortly after he made that statement, the dream was over.
I can't help but to think the spirit of Michelle's father is with her during this beautiful time where her husband will be inaugurated tomorrow as the 1st Black President of the United States of America. I am honored and pleased to be a young person who has been heavily involved in his campaign by registering voters, giving donations, sharing political facts with peers and friends, and offering my prayers for his family and supporters. The victory is here and the Obama's and Biden's are balancing a special burden that they were called to bear. I am sure Michelle's dad has been with her every step of the way to provide that support only a daddy can give his daughter.
A dad's love can be compared to no other...
Sunday, January 18, 2009
God's Glory
Today, I felt God's Glory....again. You ever been in church, read a scripture at home, heard a song, or meditate and prayed to God and it you felt His presence? Like God just held your hand and a crazy chill goes all through you? And you just cry uncontrollably with heartfelt joy? There is no trace of sadness. These tears spell out "thanksgiving" as they roll down your beaming cheeks.
Your mind begins to play scenes from reels of of your life's short films. You see the great times where you skipped through fields lilies with sunshiny skies and light breezes. The days that are easy like Sunday morning where the living is just good. Your memory also flashes still photos of your past that reflects the tougher times that shapes your character and gives your wisdom. The ones where the light was so dimly lit in the tunnel, there seemed to be no path out. When the rent money was unseen, where your family fell apart, where financial aid was depleted. The times that created heartache, migraines, sleepless nights and fear.
I lifted my hands higher in praise and the tears flow faster as I saw all the ways God healed my heart, saved me from trouble, created miracles in my life, and showed me ways out when there seemed to be none. God has been so awesome and so faithful and trusting. I continue to bask in His Glory as I speak my love to God as I magnify him with more praise and more offerings of thanksgiving.
Then I see colors with my eyes closed that represent the present and what is to come. The hues are so beautifully integrated as they flow in a motion that is indescribable. I wish I could form the language to relay what my brain is witnessing. But, then I realize you can't describe the Glory of God. All I can say is you will know it when you experience it and you want it to last forever. It is a treasure. When it is bestowed upon you, know that God trusts you with something He has for you to do for His Kingdom.
If you haven't been there yet, don't fret. If you are hungry for God's Glory, He will give it to you when He knows you are ready. Understand this, with every gift comes a price. Prepare your mind and spirit for the gift. And be ready to work for God. Have a heart for God's love and don't let anything or anyone cause you to turn your heart away from Him or to doubt Him. Circumstances will come to test your faith. Be still and know God is who He said He is. (1 Kings 17)
Love and Blessings...
Buttafly
Your mind begins to play scenes from reels of of your life's short films. You see the great times where you skipped through fields lilies with sunshiny skies and light breezes. The days that are easy like Sunday morning where the living is just good. Your memory also flashes still photos of your past that reflects the tougher times that shapes your character and gives your wisdom. The ones where the light was so dimly lit in the tunnel, there seemed to be no path out. When the rent money was unseen, where your family fell apart, where financial aid was depleted. The times that created heartache, migraines, sleepless nights and fear.
I lifted my hands higher in praise and the tears flow faster as I saw all the ways God healed my heart, saved me from trouble, created miracles in my life, and showed me ways out when there seemed to be none. God has been so awesome and so faithful and trusting. I continue to bask in His Glory as I speak my love to God as I magnify him with more praise and more offerings of thanksgiving.
Then I see colors with my eyes closed that represent the present and what is to come. The hues are so beautifully integrated as they flow in a motion that is indescribable. I wish I could form the language to relay what my brain is witnessing. But, then I realize you can't describe the Glory of God. All I can say is you will know it when you experience it and you want it to last forever. It is a treasure. When it is bestowed upon you, know that God trusts you with something He has for you to do for His Kingdom.
If you haven't been there yet, don't fret. If you are hungry for God's Glory, He will give it to you when He knows you are ready. Understand this, with every gift comes a price. Prepare your mind and spirit for the gift. And be ready to work for God. Have a heart for God's love and don't let anything or anyone cause you to turn your heart away from Him or to doubt Him. Circumstances will come to test your faith. Be still and know God is who He said He is. (1 Kings 17)
Love and Blessings...
Buttafly
Friday, January 16, 2009
Effort Test
So, I'm catching up with Ace on a few things last evening on the phone. She proceeds to tell me about this guy she met at the gym earlier this week. By the way, she doesn't sound excited about him at all. So, I knew this would be a "girl, let me tell you what this nut said/did" type of story.
Ace is ending her work out routine on the ab mat. This guy joins her and starts talking about his leg injury out of nowhere. He claims he is in his early 30s and was playing basketball in the gym with some 20 somethings on the court moments earlier. Ace lets him know he is too old to try to compete with them. Knowing her, she said it like his momma would have told him. Then he asks her prerequisite questions leading to the exchange of numbers. You know the ones like where are you from, any kids, you come here often, what do you like to do, yadda yadda. She answers some...but not really interested. This brother is not giving up, so he continues talking.
She bids him farewell due to hunger pains. He asks Ace where is she going to eat, obviously wanting to join her. She says she is going home to blend up a fruity smoothie. Do you know this brother asks if he could come? Sir, I just met you like 15 minutes ago. So, umm...No. Not at all. He then asks for the number. Ace gave it to him more or less to keep it moving.
Dude calls and they arrange to take a work out class together to "hang out," if you will, without having to do the whole date thing. Ace shows up for the class a few days later as promised. Dude is a no show. Okay, whatever. Another bites the dust before he even knows her last name. Poor baby has weak game and no follow through. No big deal. Then, dude texts her that same night and asks can he come over. In the words of Neffe (Keyshia Cole's sister), "Are you serious??"
I can't even be mad at dude because I've peeped his game. I've been through this test several times from guys. I recognize it for what it is...it's the effort test. It gauges how much of a gentleman he would have to be in order to "date" his prey. This test also reflects that this 30 something year old is still in the game playing stage. I would bet he has a crew of women lined up serving different purposes. Hilarious. Did I mention he is divorced?
Sigh... Ace, keep it moving, girl...keep it moving.
Ace is ending her work out routine on the ab mat. This guy joins her and starts talking about his leg injury out of nowhere. He claims he is in his early 30s and was playing basketball in the gym with some 20 somethings on the court moments earlier. Ace lets him know he is too old to try to compete with them. Knowing her, she said it like his momma would have told him. Then he asks her prerequisite questions leading to the exchange of numbers. You know the ones like where are you from, any kids, you come here often, what do you like to do, yadda yadda. She answers some...but not really interested. This brother is not giving up, so he continues talking.
She bids him farewell due to hunger pains. He asks Ace where is she going to eat, obviously wanting to join her. She says she is going home to blend up a fruity smoothie. Do you know this brother asks if he could come? Sir, I just met you like 15 minutes ago. So, umm...No. Not at all. He then asks for the number. Ace gave it to him more or less to keep it moving.
Dude calls and they arrange to take a work out class together to "hang out," if you will, without having to do the whole date thing. Ace shows up for the class a few days later as promised. Dude is a no show. Okay, whatever. Another bites the dust before he even knows her last name. Poor baby has weak game and no follow through. No big deal. Then, dude texts her that same night and asks can he come over. In the words of Neffe (Keyshia Cole's sister), "Are you serious??"
I can't even be mad at dude because I've peeped his game. I've been through this test several times from guys. I recognize it for what it is...it's the effort test. It gauges how much of a gentleman he would have to be in order to "date" his prey. This test also reflects that this 30 something year old is still in the game playing stage. I would bet he has a crew of women lined up serving different purposes. Hilarious. Did I mention he is divorced?
Sigh... Ace, keep it moving, girl...keep it moving.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Buy U a Drink
12:13 p.m. Thursday. Your 2 month cutie calls you during your lunch break at work saying, "I miss you. Let me buy you a drink tonight." This guy seems really cool, he makes you laugh, he is a gentleman with street sense, has a decent job, has only 1 kid, loves his momma, and goes to church. Sounds like a keeper, right? There is a hint of mystery about him you are not completely sure about. But, you like him. So, you agree to have drinks at 7:30 p.m.
7:45 p.m. Thursday. You order your Long Island and he orders his Vodka and Cranberry. You sip and talk, and sip and laugh, and sip some more. It takes much more than one drink to make you tipsy, so you sip a little bit more. The conversation is great, as always. Then you excuse yourself to the ladies room. Before you do, cutie notices your drink is low and tells you he will order you another. He is just too sweet. You thank him and walk towards the back of the bar. You return to a fresh Long Island sitting on the counter with your name on it. Before thinking twice, you take a sip and continue with the conversation. After 2 more sips, cutie's words slur as they enter your ear and his face looks fuzzy. In fact, everything starts to get fuzzy. You ate as soon as you left work, so why are you feeling this way?
Black Out....
11:58 p.m. Thursday. The next thing you remember is waking up in cutie's apartment, wearing his clothes, in a bed that is not yours. You wonder what the heck happened and how do you get out of here. Did he take a piece of you that you can never have back?
Little did you know, this seemingly perfect guy was far from wonderful. He uses date rape drugs very often when he doesn't get what he wants when he wants it. It seems you made him "wait" to long for intimacy. He's been plotting on you for 2 weeks now. Yes, you saw signs. That hint of mystery you felt never sat too well with you. He did seem to have a little control issue too. And, you shouldn't have left an unattended drink with him. You know better than that. That is one of the top rules in the dating game you swore by. No matter what, none of these reasons gives the bastard the right to lie and steal and take from you.
Thank God, I got out in time. My Ace knew where I was because I gave her his address. I was non-responsive to all text messages from friends and family due to the black out. Because that is abnormal behavior for me, those same family and friends came looking for me. And they found me before his plans became reality.
I thought this would never happen to me, like most of us think. We are invincible and we would never meet anyone who would want to harm us. We are good people, right? But it did happen.
The beautiful part is God allowed me to live through this experience to have another testimony.
Sure, it was hard to deal with initially. I would play everything over and over in my mind to try to remember what actually happened. But, I couldn't. I never could. I finally came to the point where I stopped trying. I rebuked him from my life for my personal healing and restoration. I learned to accept what happened, to talk about it openly, to forgive myself for trusting him, and to even pray for his soul. Yes, I pray for him because I recognize he is sick. But, I don't communicate with him and I am not trying to save him. Only God can do that.
My advice to all single ladies (and men) is listen to the Holy Spirit at all times. Follow the instincts God has given you that scream something is not right and run like the wind. Don't fall for the charm when you can't trust the person. Don't leave your drink, food or belongings with someone you barely know. God will ALWAYS show you who you are truly dealing with if you take the time to ask, wait and listen for His response.
7:45 p.m. Thursday. You order your Long Island and he orders his Vodka and Cranberry. You sip and talk, and sip and laugh, and sip some more. It takes much more than one drink to make you tipsy, so you sip a little bit more. The conversation is great, as always. Then you excuse yourself to the ladies room. Before you do, cutie notices your drink is low and tells you he will order you another. He is just too sweet. You thank him and walk towards the back of the bar. You return to a fresh Long Island sitting on the counter with your name on it. Before thinking twice, you take a sip and continue with the conversation. After 2 more sips, cutie's words slur as they enter your ear and his face looks fuzzy. In fact, everything starts to get fuzzy. You ate as soon as you left work, so why are you feeling this way?
Black Out....
11:58 p.m. Thursday. The next thing you remember is waking up in cutie's apartment, wearing his clothes, in a bed that is not yours. You wonder what the heck happened and how do you get out of here. Did he take a piece of you that you can never have back?
Little did you know, this seemingly perfect guy was far from wonderful. He uses date rape drugs very often when he doesn't get what he wants when he wants it. It seems you made him "wait" to long for intimacy. He's been plotting on you for 2 weeks now. Yes, you saw signs. That hint of mystery you felt never sat too well with you. He did seem to have a little control issue too. And, you shouldn't have left an unattended drink with him. You know better than that. That is one of the top rules in the dating game you swore by. No matter what, none of these reasons gives the bastard the right to lie and steal and take from you.
Thank God, I got out in time. My Ace knew where I was because I gave her his address. I was non-responsive to all text messages from friends and family due to the black out. Because that is abnormal behavior for me, those same family and friends came looking for me. And they found me before his plans became reality.
I thought this would never happen to me, like most of us think. We are invincible and we would never meet anyone who would want to harm us. We are good people, right? But it did happen.
The beautiful part is God allowed me to live through this experience to have another testimony.
Sure, it was hard to deal with initially. I would play everything over and over in my mind to try to remember what actually happened. But, I couldn't. I never could. I finally came to the point where I stopped trying. I rebuked him from my life for my personal healing and restoration. I learned to accept what happened, to talk about it openly, to forgive myself for trusting him, and to even pray for his soul. Yes, I pray for him because I recognize he is sick. But, I don't communicate with him and I am not trying to save him. Only God can do that.
My advice to all single ladies (and men) is listen to the Holy Spirit at all times. Follow the instincts God has given you that scream something is not right and run like the wind. Don't fall for the charm when you can't trust the person. Don't leave your drink, food or belongings with someone you barely know. God will ALWAYS show you who you are truly dealing with if you take the time to ask, wait and listen for His response.
Jay and B...Creepin
By now you know I dream often. Many times I have no clue why these thoughts creep in my mind or what they actually mean at the moment. This time, I think I have absorbed too much media coverage of the Carter's....way too much.
The first scene took place in my mom's den. I was applying some performance make-up on B as if I was showing her what it would look like in the future. I don't know what that was about as I am a mascara and gloss type of girl. B was very pleasant, but not very talkative. She just pretty much sat there as I did my job. My mom reminded us of the morning we had ahead of us, and we all went off to bed. Jay was not present. He was out and about taking care of business...whatever that means.
The next scene was during the morning and I was dressed in my work out gear. I feel like I was visiting a city for business purposes. I began to jog the downtown streets, and ran into B on a corner. She said she wanted to introduce me to Jay. And there he was. Mr. Carter, himself. The man proclaimed to be the best rapper alive a short time ago. He was a real cool dude. He joked that I looked like an R&B girl and he was sure I knew nothing about his music other than the radio hits. For some reason I felt I had to prove him wrong. I do have my own little Jay Z collection. So, I began to rant off songs from the Black Album and the Blueprints volumes.
Some other girls showed up from B's entourage and they asked me to join them along with Jay. I was working out, but honey I can get my cardio on anytime. How often do you get to hang with the Carter's? Even if it is a dream. :-) We all walked a short distance to a corner store. When we walked in, it looked like a dirty subway-like restroom facility. As I came out the girls end, I saw super producer, Pharrell, laying on the floor. He looked like he was drugged up and 2 seconds from death. As I stood there feeling sadness and sickness, Jay came from the male side and spotted his friend. He went over to talk to him. But, Pharrell wasn't coherent at all. It almost seemed like his body was literally melting into the concrete.
Then I woke up. Totally strange for you, but not for me. This happens to me all the time. Either I will never understand the meaning of this dream. Or something will come to me later down the road where I look back and this will make sense.
Either way, I still wonder what it all means. Time will tell.
Peace
The first scene took place in my mom's den. I was applying some performance make-up on B as if I was showing her what it would look like in the future. I don't know what that was about as I am a mascara and gloss type of girl. B was very pleasant, but not very talkative. She just pretty much sat there as I did my job. My mom reminded us of the morning we had ahead of us, and we all went off to bed. Jay was not present. He was out and about taking care of business...whatever that means.
The next scene was during the morning and I was dressed in my work out gear. I feel like I was visiting a city for business purposes. I began to jog the downtown streets, and ran into B on a corner. She said she wanted to introduce me to Jay. And there he was. Mr. Carter, himself. The man proclaimed to be the best rapper alive a short time ago. He was a real cool dude. He joked that I looked like an R&B girl and he was sure I knew nothing about his music other than the radio hits. For some reason I felt I had to prove him wrong. I do have my own little Jay Z collection. So, I began to rant off songs from the Black Album and the Blueprints volumes.
Some other girls showed up from B's entourage and they asked me to join them along with Jay. I was working out, but honey I can get my cardio on anytime. How often do you get to hang with the Carter's? Even if it is a dream. :-) We all walked a short distance to a corner store. When we walked in, it looked like a dirty subway-like restroom facility. As I came out the girls end, I saw super producer, Pharrell, laying on the floor. He looked like he was drugged up and 2 seconds from death. As I stood there feeling sadness and sickness, Jay came from the male side and spotted his friend. He went over to talk to him. But, Pharrell wasn't coherent at all. It almost seemed like his body was literally melting into the concrete.
Then I woke up. Totally strange for you, but not for me. This happens to me all the time. Either I will never understand the meaning of this dream. Or something will come to me later down the road where I look back and this will make sense.
Either way, I still wonder what it all means. Time will tell.
Peace
Monday, January 12, 2009
Stop, Drop, Roll
I think I just heard the most ignorant mess of 2009 so far. I was listening to a syndicated radio show where the topic was based on married men outnumbering single men in the clubs. Every single woman has turned down a married man at least twice in her life. They all have the same sob story that things are not working out at home. Of course he is about to leave her...but the kids...the kids need him. He just needs someone to talk to. LOL! Can married men come up with something new?
Apparently, this tired recycled, melodramatic story works on some chicks. A fool for a woman called into the show to give her 2 pennies worth. And I do mean her comments were worth exactly that...2 cents. She claimed her husband cheated on her with the 23 year old babysitter. The girl was found in the wife's shower "cleaning up" when wifey came home. The wife boasted of the beat down she gave the sitter due to the level of disrespect. Okay, I might feel you a little bit on that. After all, the young chick was probably using the wife's loofah and special oatmeal soap. That would make me go slap off too! But, wifey went from victim to straight ignorant buffoon in a matter of 10 seconds.
Wifey said she has had her share of married men too. But, clearly she wasn't a home wrecker because she had the "decency" to meet the men at hotels instead of the bed he shared with his wife. Ma'am, are you kidding me??? So, location is what separates you from the sitter who slept with your husband??? Basically, someone should have beat you down too, right??
AND, wifey had the nerve to say all men cheat because their wives are not obliging with their sexual fantasies. The male radio host interjected to tell her she was crazy if she thought that was the reason men cheat. It goes much deeper than that. She completely disagreed as if the married men were giving her a compliment. All I could think about was the ways Lil Kim would brag about her sexual performances on the mic. Okay, so this is enough cause for you to lay down on your back, climb a wall, or hang on the balcony rail because you are said to be the better lay? And you are okay with that?
Dang! People are really disillusioned. At least keep it real. If you are a whore, say you are a whore. Don't try to clean it up and make your situation into something sweet. There is no such thing as a respectful whore or a dirty whore or a clean whore. A whore is a whore. A home wrecker is a home wrecker. A fool is a fool.
How many other women fall for this lame story that married men tell? How many women are so weak that they will creep with a man who hides his wedding ring in his pocket? Do you really think he will leave his wife?
If this is you, start '09 out right....Stop, Drop and Roll.
Apparently, this tired recycled, melodramatic story works on some chicks. A fool for a woman called into the show to give her 2 pennies worth. And I do mean her comments were worth exactly that...2 cents. She claimed her husband cheated on her with the 23 year old babysitter. The girl was found in the wife's shower "cleaning up" when wifey came home. The wife boasted of the beat down she gave the sitter due to the level of disrespect. Okay, I might feel you a little bit on that. After all, the young chick was probably using the wife's loofah and special oatmeal soap. That would make me go slap off too! But, wifey went from victim to straight ignorant buffoon in a matter of 10 seconds.
Wifey said she has had her share of married men too. But, clearly she wasn't a home wrecker because she had the "decency" to meet the men at hotels instead of the bed he shared with his wife. Ma'am, are you kidding me??? So, location is what separates you from the sitter who slept with your husband??? Basically, someone should have beat you down too, right??
AND, wifey had the nerve to say all men cheat because their wives are not obliging with their sexual fantasies. The male radio host interjected to tell her she was crazy if she thought that was the reason men cheat. It goes much deeper than that. She completely disagreed as if the married men were giving her a compliment. All I could think about was the ways Lil Kim would brag about her sexual performances on the mic. Okay, so this is enough cause for you to lay down on your back, climb a wall, or hang on the balcony rail because you are said to be the better lay? And you are okay with that?
Dang! People are really disillusioned. At least keep it real. If you are a whore, say you are a whore. Don't try to clean it up and make your situation into something sweet. There is no such thing as a respectful whore or a dirty whore or a clean whore. A whore is a whore. A home wrecker is a home wrecker. A fool is a fool.
How many other women fall for this lame story that married men tell? How many women are so weak that they will creep with a man who hides his wedding ring in his pocket? Do you really think he will leave his wife?
If this is you, start '09 out right....Stop, Drop and Roll.
- Stop the madness dealing (calling, texting, emailing, flirting, meeting, kissing, hugging, having sex) with ALL married men.
- Drop the insecurities and excuses (all the good ones are NOT taken).
- Roll on with your life in the right lane (ask God for forgiveness, do some soul searching and date single men ONLY).
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Drummer Meets Girl
I told you this weekend would produce a story. I must admit it's nothing new. Boy meets girl. Boy likes girl. Boy attempts to get to know girl. However, I was true to my word. No guy get my digits right now. No matter how fly. To my surprise, this guy didn't ask for my cell number. Instead, he leaves me with a business card and the request to contact him. Should I?
As planned, I took my Ace to the south side for her official introduction to the SWAT. We checked out Morris' chiseled, dark chocolate frame in Not Easily Broken at ATL Movies in the Marketplace. That reminds me of something I have to mention. Maybe I have been blinded by his swag all these years (post Rickey from Boyz in the Hood) and missed this minor, yet noticeable detail. Does anyone know Morris' grill is not all that tight? On the right-hand side of the bottom row, there is a space I had no clue existed before. Now, he is still super sexy and this flaw does not subtract any points from his well deserved 10+. I just wonder if I am alone in this observation.
I forgot to ask my Ace about my discovery. But, you will find once you view the film, and I do recommend this to EVERY 25 and over adult, the writing and emotions are delivered in such a way that minor physical details are easily forgotten. With the exception of Taraji's wardrobe. Her character portrays a successful, real estate tycoon who has the tendency to try keeping up with the Jones'. But, I'm saying. The stylist couldn't put my girl in something more than bargain basement business suits and "made in China" looking like pumps?? I'm still mad about that.
Okay, back to the point. After the movie, we ate wings and things at The Ultimate across the street. The wait was ridiculously long and the service was so pathetic that I swore I would never patronize them again. Let's not forget how we both left the premises with headaches due to the booming 808s. Then I remember I swore this place off more than once before. Apparently, I need to write these things down. My belly was full, but Ace and I felt a void...like the night shouldn't end this way. Ace suggested we check out the Wine Loft downtown. Bingo.
The Wine Loft is my new get-a-way spot. The ambiance is parallel to that of Love Jones meets The J Spot (Girlfriends). The lighting is soothing; the suede, mocha couches are comfy; and the wine is delicious. This is where the story unfolds. Finally, I know. Just stay with me.
We are sitting across from the bar, next to the live band. The sax, drums, keys and bass delivered some throw back sounds from Earth, Wind and Fire, Stevie, Maxwell and the gheri curl having Michal Jackson. The one from Off the Wall and Thriller days. The band was definitely jammin on the one. I swayed back and forth, waved my hands in the air and closed my eyes thinking back to some good times. As I sang without any attempt of staying in tune, I noticed Drummer smiling at me. I didn't think much of it because the Riesling caused me to smile at everyone. However, I felt his vibe when I wasn't looking his way. Uh oh, this guy is going to say something to me. Yes, he is attractive. But, I'm focused on making Buttafly better. So, I'm not interested.
After enjoying 2 sets of feel good music and 2 glasses of wine, it was time to make an exit. As we put on our coats, Drummer puts in his bid and says he wants to talk to me. Before I could say anything, he gives me his card and asks me to contact him. I took the card, smiled and told him my name before saying goodnight.
Now, I have this card in my possession. It's sitting in a compartment in my purse. I'm not calling him. It's nothing personal, it just is what it is. Luckily for him, his email address is included. In this case, I might email him. Maybe. Not sure yet. No promises. But, I might. We'll see.
Focus, Buttafly, focus...
As planned, I took my Ace to the south side for her official introduction to the SWAT. We checked out Morris' chiseled, dark chocolate frame in Not Easily Broken at ATL Movies in the Marketplace. That reminds me of something I have to mention. Maybe I have been blinded by his swag all these years (post Rickey from Boyz in the Hood) and missed this minor, yet noticeable detail. Does anyone know Morris' grill is not all that tight? On the right-hand side of the bottom row, there is a space I had no clue existed before. Now, he is still super sexy and this flaw does not subtract any points from his well deserved 10+. I just wonder if I am alone in this observation.
I forgot to ask my Ace about my discovery. But, you will find once you view the film, and I do recommend this to EVERY 25 and over adult, the writing and emotions are delivered in such a way that minor physical details are easily forgotten. With the exception of Taraji's wardrobe. Her character portrays a successful, real estate tycoon who has the tendency to try keeping up with the Jones'. But, I'm saying. The stylist couldn't put my girl in something more than bargain basement business suits and "made in China" looking like pumps?? I'm still mad about that.
Okay, back to the point. After the movie, we ate wings and things at The Ultimate across the street. The wait was ridiculously long and the service was so pathetic that I swore I would never patronize them again. Let's not forget how we both left the premises with headaches due to the booming 808s. Then I remember I swore this place off more than once before. Apparently, I need to write these things down. My belly was full, but Ace and I felt a void...like the night shouldn't end this way. Ace suggested we check out the Wine Loft downtown. Bingo.
The Wine Loft is my new get-a-way spot. The ambiance is parallel to that of Love Jones meets The J Spot (Girlfriends). The lighting is soothing; the suede, mocha couches are comfy; and the wine is delicious. This is where the story unfolds. Finally, I know. Just stay with me.
We are sitting across from the bar, next to the live band. The sax, drums, keys and bass delivered some throw back sounds from Earth, Wind and Fire, Stevie, Maxwell and the gheri curl having Michal Jackson. The one from Off the Wall and Thriller days. The band was definitely jammin on the one. I swayed back and forth, waved my hands in the air and closed my eyes thinking back to some good times. As I sang without any attempt of staying in tune, I noticed Drummer smiling at me. I didn't think much of it because the Riesling caused me to smile at everyone. However, I felt his vibe when I wasn't looking his way. Uh oh, this guy is going to say something to me. Yes, he is attractive. But, I'm focused on making Buttafly better. So, I'm not interested.
After enjoying 2 sets of feel good music and 2 glasses of wine, it was time to make an exit. As we put on our coats, Drummer puts in his bid and says he wants to talk to me. Before I could say anything, he gives me his card and asks me to contact him. I took the card, smiled and told him my name before saying goodnight.
Now, I have this card in my possession. It's sitting in a compartment in my purse. I'm not calling him. It's nothing personal, it just is what it is. Luckily for him, his email address is included. In this case, I might email him. Maybe. Not sure yet. No promises. But, I might. We'll see.
Focus, Buttafly, focus...
Friday, January 9, 2009
Fly High...
TGIF, right? The paycheck hit the bank account at 12 a.m. this morning. cha-ching-ching. I'ma pay these bills today and keep it moving.
You know what? I haven't hit the night life scene in the city for a while. I've been in chill, get focus and get your mind right mode for a few months. I stayed home most weekends to write, read, research, meditate, relax, watch movies, and take naps. All of that was necessary to get some things in order. I suppose I can break from my hibernation to grace the city with my presence.
I need to make a few calls to arrange my little escapades. I refuse to go clubbing. Too crowded, too fake, too loud, too expensive. I think I might hang out in the SWAT where I was raised. Yep, that is what I am doing. I am going to take my Ace to my stomping grounds and have a good time with good folks. Eat some carbs and nasty, high caloric treats. Hot wings, onion rings, nachos, and some chocolate. Don't forget the martinis. I'll get back to my veggies, fruit, yogurt and granola Monday morning! :-)
And there is always room for a bit of flirting. The kind where I smile, I laugh and may even share a joke or two. But, there will be no exchange of real names or phone numbers. Still not ready for that yet.
I am sure I will be inspired and will have a story for you in a few days. My crew and I never have a dull moment when we flock together.
Be safe and fly high this weekend!
You know what? I haven't hit the night life scene in the city for a while. I've been in chill, get focus and get your mind right mode for a few months. I stayed home most weekends to write, read, research, meditate, relax, watch movies, and take naps. All of that was necessary to get some things in order. I suppose I can break from my hibernation to grace the city with my presence.
I need to make a few calls to arrange my little escapades. I refuse to go clubbing. Too crowded, too fake, too loud, too expensive. I think I might hang out in the SWAT where I was raised. Yep, that is what I am doing. I am going to take my Ace to my stomping grounds and have a good time with good folks. Eat some carbs and nasty, high caloric treats. Hot wings, onion rings, nachos, and some chocolate. Don't forget the martinis. I'll get back to my veggies, fruit, yogurt and granola Monday morning! :-)
And there is always room for a bit of flirting. The kind where I smile, I laugh and may even share a joke or two. But, there will be no exchange of real names or phone numbers. Still not ready for that yet.
I am sure I will be inspired and will have a story for you in a few days. My crew and I never have a dull moment when we flock together.
Be safe and fly high this weekend!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Save It or Spread It
I was checking out a few celeb gossip websites to get some updates on the happs in Hollywood. I admit I have some sort of addiction to them at this season in my life. But, I noticed a trend that was interesting to me.
Vanessa and Angela Simmons from Run's House debuted their new show, Daddy's Girls, on MTV last week. Of course we all know reality shows are somewhat scripted. So, I expect there to be some fabrication and embellishment here and there. I decided to check out the first episode since I enjoyed the story lines on the family show. The show basically introduced the 2 co-stars, but focused primarily on Angela's recent breakup from her ex, TK (who we saw on eps of Run's House). Angela insinuated to her girls that she was waiting for her husband to share her virginity with. According to her, TK could not handle the pressure, so they went their separate ways.
Okay, first let me say that Angela is around 21 and I am sure TK is the same age if not a few years older. If guys in their 30s have a hard time waiting, then surely a 20 something year old guy in heat is going to find it very difficult to wait until marriage. Especially when the farthest thing from his mind is settling down and being committed to one girl. I am not surprised at all, but glad that Angela stuck to her rule and is remaining true to her belief system.
The problem I have is the view of the public. As I fished around some celeb gossip sites the last few days, I was a little disturbed. For those who acknowledged the show and provided feedback were very negative about Angela's claim. They basically called her a liar and refused to believe that any 20 something year old chick prefers waiting to spread eagle before meeting her husband.
I know this is 2009 and I recognize that every sitcom, cartoon, film, and commercial finds some kind of way to mention sex...no matter what. I also understand the STD rate amongst African American women is out of control. I am also fully aware that many women her age carry condoms like lip gloss and treat sex like a sport. I am all about having your own protection if you are active and using it 100% of the time. But, why is it so hard to believe a young, famous, attractive, and successful female actually wants to save herself for her husband?
I take this personally as I reflect on my collegiate years. I spent 5 years at an HBCU ( needed 1 year to party) defending my morals and beliefs when it came to sexual intimacy. Granted I was a natural flirt and didn't have any problems meeting fellas on and off the yard. Despite all that, I was very "tight," if you will, and I wanted to keep it that way. My girls knew how I was and understood my reasoning of waiting, even if they didn't follow suite. But plenty of others thought I was frontin when they heard I wasn't giving it up...especially since relations seemed to be a chapter in the rites of college passage. But, the fellas knew who were on the receiving end of my objection to take it further.
Therefore, I applaud Angela. In fact I give her a standing ovation for the nerve to go against the sex grain. We are so used to grime and grit and filth and immorality that we hate on the just and the righteous and the pure. We believe in lust and swinging and adultery. But, we wouldn't dare imitate or celebrate virginity and born-again virginity.
Even if this storyline is another embellishment of the reality trend, I appreciate MTV for putting this topic on blast. Maybe the more it is discussed amongst the masses, the more people will hold out for matrimony.
After all, do you really want every Quan, Rashad and Mike to report back to the crew on your pock, lock and drop it routines behind closed doors??
Vanessa and Angela Simmons from Run's House debuted their new show, Daddy's Girls, on MTV last week. Of course we all know reality shows are somewhat scripted. So, I expect there to be some fabrication and embellishment here and there. I decided to check out the first episode since I enjoyed the story lines on the family show. The show basically introduced the 2 co-stars, but focused primarily on Angela's recent breakup from her ex, TK (who we saw on eps of Run's House). Angela insinuated to her girls that she was waiting for her husband to share her virginity with. According to her, TK could not handle the pressure, so they went their separate ways.
Okay, first let me say that Angela is around 21 and I am sure TK is the same age if not a few years older. If guys in their 30s have a hard time waiting, then surely a 20 something year old guy in heat is going to find it very difficult to wait until marriage. Especially when the farthest thing from his mind is settling down and being committed to one girl. I am not surprised at all, but glad that Angela stuck to her rule and is remaining true to her belief system.
The problem I have is the view of the public. As I fished around some celeb gossip sites the last few days, I was a little disturbed. For those who acknowledged the show and provided feedback were very negative about Angela's claim. They basically called her a liar and refused to believe that any 20 something year old chick prefers waiting to spread eagle before meeting her husband.
I know this is 2009 and I recognize that every sitcom, cartoon, film, and commercial finds some kind of way to mention sex...no matter what. I also understand the STD rate amongst African American women is out of control. I am also fully aware that many women her age carry condoms like lip gloss and treat sex like a sport. I am all about having your own protection if you are active and using it 100% of the time. But, why is it so hard to believe a young, famous, attractive, and successful female actually wants to save herself for her husband?
I take this personally as I reflect on my collegiate years. I spent 5 years at an HBCU ( needed 1 year to party) defending my morals and beliefs when it came to sexual intimacy. Granted I was a natural flirt and didn't have any problems meeting fellas on and off the yard. Despite all that, I was very "tight," if you will, and I wanted to keep it that way. My girls knew how I was and understood my reasoning of waiting, even if they didn't follow suite. But plenty of others thought I was frontin when they heard I wasn't giving it up...especially since relations seemed to be a chapter in the rites of college passage. But, the fellas knew who were on the receiving end of my objection to take it further.
Therefore, I applaud Angela. In fact I give her a standing ovation for the nerve to go against the sex grain. We are so used to grime and grit and filth and immorality that we hate on the just and the righteous and the pure. We believe in lust and swinging and adultery. But, we wouldn't dare imitate or celebrate virginity and born-again virginity.
Even if this storyline is another embellishment of the reality trend, I appreciate MTV for putting this topic on blast. Maybe the more it is discussed amongst the masses, the more people will hold out for matrimony.
After all, do you really want every Quan, Rashad and Mike to report back to the crew on your pock, lock and drop it routines behind closed doors??
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Go Hard
Chello everyone. Working hard today and don't have much to share right now. However, I will check with you tomorrow (if something does not come to me before the night ends).
I hope everyone had a Terrific Tuesday!
Oh yes, there is a quick thought to share with you.
Don't abandon the goals you set for 2009. Be sure they are realistic and attainable. Don't fall off the wagon and make all of them a reality by December. Yes, you have 11 months to make it happen. But keep in mind 24 hours... tick, tock, tick, tock....passes very quickly.
Stop walking your race. You are prepared for the marathon. Life has prepared you. Run after your ambitions and Go Hard, in the words of Kanye and DJ Khaled.
A wise friend once told me, if you want something badly enough pray about it, research it, read about it, study it, and focus on it. This means saying no, slapping fear in the face, and compromising when necessary.
Compromising doesn't mean be a push over. Never that. Simply learn how to make it happen when the obstacles show up to test your endurance. I have come to realize no matter how much I was a daddy's girl at home, everything will not always happen the way I planned.
There will be detours you didn't foresee. But, you better stomp on discouragement when it tries to sway you. And, don't you dare punk out on your destiny because of tough times and side-line doubters. Please believe, they are coming.
Faith tells us if God said it is so, if he is pulling us to it, then it will happen if we keep pushing through.
Stay the Course.
I hope everyone had a Terrific Tuesday!
Oh yes, there is a quick thought to share with you.
Don't abandon the goals you set for 2009. Be sure they are realistic and attainable. Don't fall off the wagon and make all of them a reality by December. Yes, you have 11 months to make it happen. But keep in mind 24 hours... tick, tock, tick, tock....passes very quickly.
Stop walking your race. You are prepared for the marathon. Life has prepared you. Run after your ambitions and Go Hard, in the words of Kanye and DJ Khaled.
A wise friend once told me, if you want something badly enough pray about it, research it, read about it, study it, and focus on it. This means saying no, slapping fear in the face, and compromising when necessary.
Compromising doesn't mean be a push over. Never that. Simply learn how to make it happen when the obstacles show up to test your endurance. I have come to realize no matter how much I was a daddy's girl at home, everything will not always happen the way I planned.
There will be detours you didn't foresee. But, you better stomp on discouragement when it tries to sway you. And, don't you dare punk out on your destiny because of tough times and side-line doubters. Please believe, they are coming.
Faith tells us if God said it is so, if he is pulling us to it, then it will happen if we keep pushing through.
Stay the Course.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Old School Love
Moments ago, I was suddenly blessed by The O'Jays pouring honey-like lyrics through the radio singing, "Lovin you has made my life much sweeter baby. Baby since I've got you, everything is alright." Hmmm, I haven't heard that in some years. I may be in my late 20's, but I am an Old School R&B girl at heart. To experience a taste of what I just felt, listen to a clip of the song here: http://www.jango.com/music/The+O+Jays?l=0
Did that send a chill through you? The lead is basically making this woman understand he is thankful she chose him to love and live and learn this world together. It doesn't matter that his bank account hasn't reached balla status, that he isn't driving a Range, he is not even concerned about the layoffs at his job. This man is proclaiming true love to his woman. Plain and simple.
What happened to those days? The crooners with passion like The O'Jays, Frankie Beverly & Maze, Marvin, Luther, The Whispers, Al Green, Teddy P, Alexander O'Neal, and even DeBarge. Those gentlemen would wear their suits while adding sweet melodies to the reality of real love and commitment, not just physical interaction. This movement seemed to die out when the New Jack era hit the stage. Those fellas wore baggy jeans, combat boots and a hat to the back ready to hit it and quit it. R. Kelly & Public Announcement, Jodeci and H-Town wanted to knock your boots and go half on a baby. Granted, those songs have their place and I am not disputing their purposes. But, I truly miss the soul stirring, made you want to be in a relationship and believe that true love exists type of music.
I am glad to know there are a few brothers holding it down today on lovers' lane. And I do mean very few. Eric Benet, Kem, Maxwell, and others may not reach platinum status within a year's time of an albums' release. But, they aren't afraid to reveal their vulnerability and the yearning had to fill their hearts with all the love a woman has to offer. Check these lyrics:
Eric Benet, "I Wanna Be Loved"--
"I wanna be loved, Faithful and true. I wanna be loved, 10 million lifetimes with you. I wanna be loved, and after all I've been through...I'll let my heart take it's chances, just to be loved by you."
Kem, "I Can't Stop Loving You"--
"And I can't stop loving you, I can't help myself. And I can't get over you, no matter what I tell myself baby."
Maxwell, "Fortunate"--
"Fortunate to have you girl, I'm so glad you're in my world. Just as sure as the sky is blue, I bless the day that I found you."
And, even though this brother was a one hit wonder, please believe this is a serious love jones.
Jesse Powell, "You"--
"I've finally found the nerve to say, I'm gonna make a change in my life starting here today. I surrender all my love, I never thought I could. I'm giving all my love away and there's only one reason that I would. And baby it's yooooou."
Real talk, if I don't have that unconditional love these brothers are feeling...if I can't be with a man who has that "hurt-sometimes" passion for me...if I can't be 100% Buttafly and let him see my flaws and all (Beyonce spoke on that song), then I'll keep flying til I meet my mate of soul.
I gotta have that Old School Love...
Did that send a chill through you? The lead is basically making this woman understand he is thankful she chose him to love and live and learn this world together. It doesn't matter that his bank account hasn't reached balla status, that he isn't driving a Range, he is not even concerned about the layoffs at his job. This man is proclaiming true love to his woman. Plain and simple.
What happened to those days? The crooners with passion like The O'Jays, Frankie Beverly & Maze, Marvin, Luther, The Whispers, Al Green, Teddy P, Alexander O'Neal, and even DeBarge. Those gentlemen would wear their suits while adding sweet melodies to the reality of real love and commitment, not just physical interaction. This movement seemed to die out when the New Jack era hit the stage. Those fellas wore baggy jeans, combat boots and a hat to the back ready to hit it and quit it. R. Kelly & Public Announcement, Jodeci and H-Town wanted to knock your boots and go half on a baby. Granted, those songs have their place and I am not disputing their purposes. But, I truly miss the soul stirring, made you want to be in a relationship and believe that true love exists type of music.
I am glad to know there are a few brothers holding it down today on lovers' lane. And I do mean very few. Eric Benet, Kem, Maxwell, and others may not reach platinum status within a year's time of an albums' release. But, they aren't afraid to reveal their vulnerability and the yearning had to fill their hearts with all the love a woman has to offer. Check these lyrics:
Eric Benet, "I Wanna Be Loved"--
"I wanna be loved, Faithful and true. I wanna be loved, 10 million lifetimes with you. I wanna be loved, and after all I've been through...I'll let my heart take it's chances, just to be loved by you."
Kem, "I Can't Stop Loving You"--
"And I can't stop loving you, I can't help myself. And I can't get over you, no matter what I tell myself baby."
Maxwell, "Fortunate"--
"Fortunate to have you girl, I'm so glad you're in my world. Just as sure as the sky is blue, I bless the day that I found you."
And, even though this brother was a one hit wonder, please believe this is a serious love jones.
Jesse Powell, "You"--
"I've finally found the nerve to say, I'm gonna make a change in my life starting here today. I surrender all my love, I never thought I could. I'm giving all my love away and there's only one reason that I would. And baby it's yooooou."
Real talk, if I don't have that unconditional love these brothers are feeling...if I can't be with a man who has that "hurt-sometimes" passion for me...if I can't be 100% Buttafly and let him see my flaws and all (Beyonce spoke on that song), then I'll keep flying til I meet my mate of soul.
I gotta have that Old School Love...
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Soul Food Sundays
My mother's nest is pretty much empty, which is interesting. My mother and father bought their home approximately 40 years ago in Atlanta. Most of the neighbors have been around the majority of the time as well, so everyone still knows everyone very well. In fact, I am pretty sure my neighbors would whisper to my mother when they caught me acting out of character (which was not very often during my adolescent age). She never let on to me, but that would explain some talks we had that left me wondering, "how the heck did she know I might have done that?"
Our home was the "Kool Aid" house on the block, if you will. Everyone played in our yard, enjoyed my Nintendo, ate our popsicles and absolutely loved my momma! She is the old school, stay at home mom who is certainly called into Motherhood...and she does it so effortlessly. As long as I can recall, it has been a tradition to eat a belly-filling Sunday dinner every week without fail. Momma always cooked through the week while my father was living. Honey, she knew back in the day the way to his heart before any of these self-help books were conceived. After my dad passed, Sundays became extra special to my family. Now, that the nest is empty, Sundays are indeed a secret ingredient in the glue that keeps my family together.
We attend differnet churches and eagerly await the tasty menu every Sunday. I usually eat a very light breakfast (which is mostly a cup of yogurt) and consume H2O for lunch to prepare my belly for Sunday dinner. I come home from my 8:45 church service, take a little nap at my abode, and head to momma's house for the Soul Food dinner. The plates don't normally hit the table until 4:30 or 5, but we gather as early as 2 p.m. for the fellowship. I am sure you all know the movie Soul Food very well. Ironically enough, I am the baby of the family and I truly embody the essence of Bird. You already know I am not all up in the kitchen and no one tries to invite me. I bring some of the entertainment of laughter and always seem to share some crazy story of folks or situations I have encountered from the week.
As the aromas fill the kitchen, we talk and talk and talk as if we have not spoken all week. Keep in mind my sisters, mother and I call each other every day. But, the phone convo pales in comparison to the visible and physical fellowship.
When the dinner is finally ready (it always seems as if I have waited 800 hours due to the hunger pains at that point), we all gather around the table. My mother, my 2 sisters, brother-in-law, niece, and any other guests who decide to drop hold hands as my brother-in-law thanks God for this gathering and for the nourishment set before us. The greens, mac n cheese, chicken, Cornish hens, prime rib, squash casserole, asparagus, black eyed peas (here they are again), yams, cornbread, ribs, cream corn, carrots, green beans, fried okra, sauteed mushrooms, roasted tri-color peppers, new potatoes with parsley, and another other lip smacking food you can think of are ready for consumption!!!
Hmmmm, mmmm, mmm! Lord have mercy! My mother has to be from Heaven because there is no earthly reason anyone should be able to prepare raw food from scratch and throw all this love and feet in it to make me want to smack someone in the face!!!! Whew!
I simply cannot wait for Soul Food Sundays. My friends understand there is no way you can get me away from my mother's dinner table Sunday evenings. There have been exceptions....very rare exceptions. If I have tickets to a Falcons game or...hmmm...well that may be the only reason I would not be at this table that has held hundreds of Sunday dinners. You simply cannot find food like this anywhere expect at this very table!
Please know if I am dating a guy, and he makes it to this table on a Sunday, he must truly be special. In fact I can only remember one guy. Yes, it was the X. I don't allow everyone into this space...into this family ritual. Soul Food Sundays allow for vulnerability, goofy behavior, controversial conversation, confessions to be made, and the room to say any and everything that is not politically correct. If the walls could talk in my momma's kitchen... Some of you know what I am talking about.
I am sitting at this Soul Food table now, smelling all those delicious aromas. I had to let you know what I am experiencing at this very moment. I am closing this out as Teri is wrapping things up...it was her choice to throw down in the kitchen today. Max is at the store getting a Sunday paper with my niece. And Kenny, well Kenny always takes a nap in front of the TV waiting on someone to yell, "Kenny, dinner is ready!" For those of you who are not familiar with Bird, Teri, Max and Kenny, please rent the movie. Your time is way over due!
Happy Sunday and Happy Eating!
Bird
Our home was the "Kool Aid" house on the block, if you will. Everyone played in our yard, enjoyed my Nintendo, ate our popsicles and absolutely loved my momma! She is the old school, stay at home mom who is certainly called into Motherhood...and she does it so effortlessly. As long as I can recall, it has been a tradition to eat a belly-filling Sunday dinner every week without fail. Momma always cooked through the week while my father was living. Honey, she knew back in the day the way to his heart before any of these self-help books were conceived. After my dad passed, Sundays became extra special to my family. Now, that the nest is empty, Sundays are indeed a secret ingredient in the glue that keeps my family together.
We attend differnet churches and eagerly await the tasty menu every Sunday. I usually eat a very light breakfast (which is mostly a cup of yogurt) and consume H2O for lunch to prepare my belly for Sunday dinner. I come home from my 8:45 church service, take a little nap at my abode, and head to momma's house for the Soul Food dinner. The plates don't normally hit the table until 4:30 or 5, but we gather as early as 2 p.m. for the fellowship. I am sure you all know the movie Soul Food very well. Ironically enough, I am the baby of the family and I truly embody the essence of Bird. You already know I am not all up in the kitchen and no one tries to invite me. I bring some of the entertainment of laughter and always seem to share some crazy story of folks or situations I have encountered from the week.
As the aromas fill the kitchen, we talk and talk and talk as if we have not spoken all week. Keep in mind my sisters, mother and I call each other every day. But, the phone convo pales in comparison to the visible and physical fellowship.
When the dinner is finally ready (it always seems as if I have waited 800 hours due to the hunger pains at that point), we all gather around the table. My mother, my 2 sisters, brother-in-law, niece, and any other guests who decide to drop hold hands as my brother-in-law thanks God for this gathering and for the nourishment set before us. The greens, mac n cheese, chicken, Cornish hens, prime rib, squash casserole, asparagus, black eyed peas (here they are again), yams, cornbread, ribs, cream corn, carrots, green beans, fried okra, sauteed mushrooms, roasted tri-color peppers, new potatoes with parsley, and another other lip smacking food you can think of are ready for consumption!!!
Hmmmm, mmmm, mmm! Lord have mercy! My mother has to be from Heaven because there is no earthly reason anyone should be able to prepare raw food from scratch and throw all this love and feet in it to make me want to smack someone in the face!!!! Whew!
I simply cannot wait for Soul Food Sundays. My friends understand there is no way you can get me away from my mother's dinner table Sunday evenings. There have been exceptions....very rare exceptions. If I have tickets to a Falcons game or...hmmm...well that may be the only reason I would not be at this table that has held hundreds of Sunday dinners. You simply cannot find food like this anywhere expect at this very table!
Please know if I am dating a guy, and he makes it to this table on a Sunday, he must truly be special. In fact I can only remember one guy. Yes, it was the X. I don't allow everyone into this space...into this family ritual. Soul Food Sundays allow for vulnerability, goofy behavior, controversial conversation, confessions to be made, and the room to say any and everything that is not politically correct. If the walls could talk in my momma's kitchen... Some of you know what I am talking about.
I am sitting at this Soul Food table now, smelling all those delicious aromas. I had to let you know what I am experiencing at this very moment. I am closing this out as Teri is wrapping things up...it was her choice to throw down in the kitchen today. Max is at the store getting a Sunday paper with my niece. And Kenny, well Kenny always takes a nap in front of the TV waiting on someone to yell, "Kenny, dinner is ready!" For those of you who are not familiar with Bird, Teri, Max and Kenny, please rent the movie. Your time is way over due!
Happy Sunday and Happy Eating!
Bird
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Mr. Unavailable
Uh oh, girls. This is the moment we all loath. You see an attractive man, he happens to know someone in your circle, which means you will see him again, there is a chemistry between you, but you avoid this at all costs because someone has papers on him. No, really, she has papers on him and carries his last name. You brush it off as you have for Denzel, LL, Jay Z, Sean Connery (my AARP crush), and all the other sexy men who are unavailable. It is just plain wrong and immoral to waste another thought on someone else's man. I thought this story would be the same. Until it happened...
Yep, he crept into my dreams last night. I thought my short-term (normally 5 days max) Unavailables crush was over. I assumed I tossed him over into the sea with all my other Unavailables weeks ago on his expiration date. So, why was he in my dreams?
The dream begin with a scene in a clothing boutique. I was shopping for an occasion that required a jazzy look, without glamor. I headed to the dressing room to try on the cutsie, colorful cocktail dresses, and POOF! That scene ended and I am now standing in front of a house. It was actually my mother's neighbor's home. As I stooped down to draw a chalk object on the concrete (I have no clue why I was doing this), Mr. Unavailable shows up. We sit Indian-style on the concrete of this very still, quiet street. We didn't touch, we didn't laugh, we only spoke. The conversation was very short, and there many quiet moments. Although there was no obvious flirting, I could feel the unspoken chemistry in my sleep. He didn't have to say anything...I didn't have to acknowledge it...it was there. Suddenly, the circle of friends showed up, and we all began to walk and talk on the street. Then, I woke.
I don't know what that is about. I truly thought I was rid of him. Now, I have to sit here and rebuke any and all unconscious thoughts I clearly have of him. There is one rule that I have and will always follow. All Unavailables will remain untouched by me. I don't care how fly, how dark and handsome, how nice, how charming he is...the man is dead to me. There is absolutely no flirting allowed. Others may disagree, but there is no such thing as harmless flirting. Any smidgen of charming exchange almost always leads to something else. It will only end if one person has a conscious or the paper holder causes harm to both parties.
Thoughts lead to Words...which lead to Actions...that forms Habits...which shapes Character.
I got some soul searching to do over here. Pray with me girls....
Yep, he crept into my dreams last night. I thought my short-term (normally 5 days max) Unavailables crush was over. I assumed I tossed him over into the sea with all my other Unavailables weeks ago on his expiration date. So, why was he in my dreams?
The dream begin with a scene in a clothing boutique. I was shopping for an occasion that required a jazzy look, without glamor. I headed to the dressing room to try on the cutsie, colorful cocktail dresses, and POOF! That scene ended and I am now standing in front of a house. It was actually my mother's neighbor's home. As I stooped down to draw a chalk object on the concrete (I have no clue why I was doing this), Mr. Unavailable shows up. We sit Indian-style on the concrete of this very still, quiet street. We didn't touch, we didn't laugh, we only spoke. The conversation was very short, and there many quiet moments. Although there was no obvious flirting, I could feel the unspoken chemistry in my sleep. He didn't have to say anything...I didn't have to acknowledge it...it was there. Suddenly, the circle of friends showed up, and we all began to walk and talk on the street. Then, I woke.
I don't know what that is about. I truly thought I was rid of him. Now, I have to sit here and rebuke any and all unconscious thoughts I clearly have of him. There is one rule that I have and will always follow. All Unavailables will remain untouched by me. I don't care how fly, how dark and handsome, how nice, how charming he is...the man is dead to me. There is absolutely no flirting allowed. Others may disagree, but there is no such thing as harmless flirting. Any smidgen of charming exchange almost always leads to something else. It will only end if one person has a conscious or the paper holder causes harm to both parties.
Thoughts lead to Words...which lead to Actions...that forms Habits...which shapes Character.
I got some soul searching to do over here. Pray with me girls....
Friday, January 2, 2009
W. Creepin...
After indulging in a fabulous celebratory New Years evening with friends at a dinner party thrown by my Ace, I came home to rest in preparation for work today. As I drifted into dreamland last night, you will never guess who crept into my subconscious thoughts.
First of all, my Ace, who we shall call Lisa, was also in the dream. It seems we were official government agents completing an assignment. Apparently we were undercover at a well attended event held at a beautiful hotel. I saw my family and friends from high school and college participating in the festivities as well. At a certain point, Lisa and I headed off to an underground room in the hotel where we set up shop to prepare for a top secret meeting. As we finished dressing into our navy blue, agent gear (how I would love to be a Law & Order detective), in walks none other than President George W. Bush.
It was very clear in the dream W. is the person we were to meet with shortly. However, we were shocked to see him so soon. I was worried something went wrong and he came to deliver unexpected news. However, his conversation was extremely casual and had absolutely nothing to do with business. He had a seat and begin to chit chat. Lisa and I used the gift of ESP to communicate with each other; both questioning his purpose and motive. Do you know W. began to verbally flirt with both of us? How hilarious is that! Of course neither one of us showed an ounce of interest. As Lisa completely ignored him, leaving me to deal with, I casually lead him to the door thanking him for dropping by before the meeting. Just then, my dream was interrupted by the cell phone alarm.
I have no clue why or how President Bush crept into my dreams. What is so funny is his "game" was just as kooky and awkward as you would think it is. Wow....
Fab Friday to you!
First of all, my Ace, who we shall call Lisa, was also in the dream. It seems we were official government agents completing an assignment. Apparently we were undercover at a well attended event held at a beautiful hotel. I saw my family and friends from high school and college participating in the festivities as well. At a certain point, Lisa and I headed off to an underground room in the hotel where we set up shop to prepare for a top secret meeting. As we finished dressing into our navy blue, agent gear (how I would love to be a Law & Order detective), in walks none other than President George W. Bush.
It was very clear in the dream W. is the person we were to meet with shortly. However, we were shocked to see him so soon. I was worried something went wrong and he came to deliver unexpected news. However, his conversation was extremely casual and had absolutely nothing to do with business. He had a seat and begin to chit chat. Lisa and I used the gift of ESP to communicate with each other; both questioning his purpose and motive. Do you know W. began to verbally flirt with both of us? How hilarious is that! Of course neither one of us showed an ounce of interest. As Lisa completely ignored him, leaving me to deal with, I casually lead him to the door thanking him for dropping by before the meeting. Just then, my dream was interrupted by the cell phone alarm.
I have no clue why or how President Bush crept into my dreams. What is so funny is his "game" was just as kooky and awkward as you would think it is. Wow....
Fab Friday to you!
Thursday, January 1, 2009
Be Still & Know...
Happy New Year Party People! We made it to the greatest year yet!
I went to my church last night to bring the New Year in. I was surrounded by a sea of beautiful people crying out to God for forgiveness, for hope, for thanksgiving. It is amazing how God will orchestrate situations and circumstances to occur in all of our lives to make us stronger, bring us closer to Him, realize our purposes in life, to see with a lucid frame of mind, and to turn our weaknesses into strengths. Once again, I am thankful for everything.
Oh yes, I am at home writing to you without my glass of Moscato. For some reason, I don't have a craving for the wine this morning. I think I am still full on God's Glory and revelations.
Any who, I have to share something with you as another testimony. I have a love for event coordination as well as public relations. I had the pleasure of working as a contractor in both fields and enjoyed them equally. I came to a cross roads 2 years ago when I returned to the corporate world for financial stability. This return was never meant to be permanent, but to serve certain purposes for a season of my life. As I felt my season coming to an end this year, I was met by a near life threatening situation concerning a young man I was dating. It seems he did not have my best interest at all (God help him), but angels were able to protect me from his plans for me. Dating was a sport for me that I thoroughly enjoyed. However, dating was the farthest thing from my mind due to this experience, therefore I became very still. Instead of hanging out with my circles of friends and flirting as I normally did in my spare time, I began to write.
Writing became my therapy, a habit, a passion and an absolute addiction. Thus, this blog was birthed (thanks to one of my angels, Isa). I completely convinced that writing is a vehicle for my destiny. Therefore, I am beginning to answer the question I used to loathe , "So what do you do" with, "I am a writer." Early this morning, that same conversation took place at church. This time, the person on the other side of the conversation asked more questions about my writing and is now interested in applying my passion to his project concerning the arts. Wow, God. Is this Part I of Your plan for me?
All I know is I asked God for 2009 to be better than 2008. I have always lived a full life, and I want to continue to be bubbled over in joy and fulfillment and happiness and success and love. This could be the start of the rest of my life. I say all this to say I have searched all my life for this time of certainty. The time when I am absolutely confident regarding my direction, path and my contribution to society and to this side of life. Now I am there. If you are searching, ask God for clarity and be still. Be still and learn to decline some offers for brunch dates, shopping days, and kick it nights with your circle of friends. You will know in your heart and in your spirit when to say no. Your soul will tell you it is time to be still and listen for answers for your destiny. God will show you and will send what and who is necessary to prepare you for your due season.
Peace unto u.
I went to my church last night to bring the New Year in. I was surrounded by a sea of beautiful people crying out to God for forgiveness, for hope, for thanksgiving. It is amazing how God will orchestrate situations and circumstances to occur in all of our lives to make us stronger, bring us closer to Him, realize our purposes in life, to see with a lucid frame of mind, and to turn our weaknesses into strengths. Once again, I am thankful for everything.
Oh yes, I am at home writing to you without my glass of Moscato. For some reason, I don't have a craving for the wine this morning. I think I am still full on God's Glory and revelations.
Any who, I have to share something with you as another testimony. I have a love for event coordination as well as public relations. I had the pleasure of working as a contractor in both fields and enjoyed them equally. I came to a cross roads 2 years ago when I returned to the corporate world for financial stability. This return was never meant to be permanent, but to serve certain purposes for a season of my life. As I felt my season coming to an end this year, I was met by a near life threatening situation concerning a young man I was dating. It seems he did not have my best interest at all (God help him), but angels were able to protect me from his plans for me. Dating was a sport for me that I thoroughly enjoyed. However, dating was the farthest thing from my mind due to this experience, therefore I became very still. Instead of hanging out with my circles of friends and flirting as I normally did in my spare time, I began to write.
Writing became my therapy, a habit, a passion and an absolute addiction. Thus, this blog was birthed (thanks to one of my angels, Isa). I completely convinced that writing is a vehicle for my destiny. Therefore, I am beginning to answer the question I used to loathe , "So what do you do" with, "I am a writer." Early this morning, that same conversation took place at church. This time, the person on the other side of the conversation asked more questions about my writing and is now interested in applying my passion to his project concerning the arts. Wow, God. Is this Part I of Your plan for me?
All I know is I asked God for 2009 to be better than 2008. I have always lived a full life, and I want to continue to be bubbled over in joy and fulfillment and happiness and success and love. This could be the start of the rest of my life. I say all this to say I have searched all my life for this time of certainty. The time when I am absolutely confident regarding my direction, path and my contribution to society and to this side of life. Now I am there. If you are searching, ask God for clarity and be still. Be still and learn to decline some offers for brunch dates, shopping days, and kick it nights with your circle of friends. You will know in your heart and in your spirit when to say no. Your soul will tell you it is time to be still and listen for answers for your destiny. God will show you and will send what and who is necessary to prepare you for your due season.
Peace unto u.
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