Caught up in the Rapture of Love...

"Caught up in the rapture of love
Nothing else can compare
When I feel the magic of you
The feeling's always new
Caught up in the rapture of you"
--Anita Baker

When I sang this feel good melody by the classy Ms. Baker as a child, I was unaware of what I truly was humming. I just knew the arrangement of music made me happy. Becoming a young lady, I would catch this same tune in the rare moments of time on an old school R&B station. With hands raised to the sky, fingers snapping, eyes closed saying, "that was my jam." I would reminisce on the past loves and former boos. Tonight as I watch one legend, Ms. Baker, pay tribute to another legend, Mary J., on BET Honors, I still snap my fingers and close my eyes. But, this time I think about the love of my life...me.

I was raised to have confidence and to be alright with me...in this package God formulated in His image. I did that, and I would celebrate me between the flurries of the dating game. I was so busy getting fly for the social aspect of life that I rarely sat down to love on myself consistently. But, during this new season of me, I am caught up with me. Consistently. Just me.

Don't mistake this for arrogance. It's far from that. I appreciate my flava, my style, my physical image. But, right now I celebrate my spirit and my character building and my faith. Being single has become a pro instead of the con society paints it to be. Of course the Word always tells us what we need to know. But, sometimes we ignore it. I know I have conveniently. God said being single is a gift because because you only have to focus on improving your relationship with Him. The unique burden of juggling the cultivation of God's love and man's love is not present. I accept this gift whole-heartedly.

I am closer to 30 than I am to 20. Still a young woman, but no longer able to use the excuse of not knowing any better. Nah, I know better. Excuses have been given a death certificate. And I am better because experience continuously teaches me that. I spend time loving on God and worshipping who He is. In this space, He shows me who He wants me to be. He brings me closer and closer to the chapters of my world that allows me to act in one of my destinies. And it feels so dog gone good.

This rapture of love enlightens me on the whys. Why God created me to be fearless and adventurous. Why I am so analytical and compassionate for the broken. Why I love so hard and deep with fullness. Why I cringe at disorderly acts and chaos. My God, this rapture tastes so sweet. Sure, my spiritual taste buds are aware of the bitterness that comes in spurts. It's a part of growth and a part of being in this flesh. But, there is no way I could grasp the height and depth of such sweetness if I never experience the salt of the Earth, right? Correct. My job is to discern, decipher and do unto others no matter the amount of hate poured in my direction. No one or nothing will blow my high. It feels too good.

Do I want the love of a man? Of course I welcome love with open arms. I am quite confident that my love, my hunter, my husband, my Adam, my partner created for me will make his way to my cocoon. But, I don't wait twiddling my thumbs, reading desperate self-help books and searching the clubs and blogs to find him. Oh no. Again, I believe in order. When it's time, we will meet. And when there is room for him God will release him. I am just too caught up in the rapture of this love I have for me...the love that will one day make room for he...

Peace.